Tips For A Stay-At-Home Holiday
If there’s one thing we know for sure, this holiday season will be unlike any we’ve experienced before. With COVID cases on the rise across the country – including here in Maine – it’s more important than ever the keep our distance for the wellbeing of ourselves and our communities. Even if that means keeping distanced from friends and loved ones. As hard as it may be, that distance might be the best way to show someone how much you care – it might save someone’s life. It’s a painful truth, but one that’s worth coming to grips with sooner than later - the faster we accept the truth that things need to be different this year, the faster we can take steps to still enjoy a happy, safe holiday season.
In that spirit, I thought I’d share my tips for making socially distanced holidays no matter the circumstances. As your friendly neighborhood introverts, Chris and I have a little experience with socially distanced holidays. When we were living away from our families, in Pittsburgh and then in Philadelphia, we lived too far away to justify traveling for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Not only were the holidays too close together to afford that much travel, but since our families all live so close to one another (he and I grew up about 30 minutes from each other) we couldn’t handle the stress of house-hopping for days on end when we’d be in town. So it was either one or the other – and in having to be choosy when it came to traveling for the holidays, we discovered that solo holidays are totally our thing. As much as I love times when we can gather at a big table with a big group of people, I feel like we’re uniquely prepared to spend the 2020 holidays solo, just us two. I understand that things look different for everyone, especially those who may live alone or with children – I’m not going to pretend I understand everyone’s circumstances – but, maybe the tips below will be helpful. Because the kindest thing we can do this year is keeping ourselves and our loved ones safe from this virus, which means keeping our distance…
Make your plan: Think about how you want your holidays to look this year. Sure, they’ll be different, but different doesn’t mean bad! Maybe you’ve always wanted to change things up – well, now’s your chance. Before communicating your boundaries, sit down, either solo or with the people you live with, to discuss how things will look this year. I’m no expert, but this could serve as a great lesson in setting boundaries with kids.
Set expectations early: For many, the holidays are the one time of year they get to see certain people in their lives, understandably, it’s going to be tough to say no to invites and gatherings. But if you set boundaries now, you can move forward confidently with a plan. I can’t recommend enough how important it is to communicate clear boundaries and expectations around holidays clearly and as early as possible. This is true during COVID times when it comes to social distancing, but also true for any time. By discussing how your holidays will look with the people you typically spend them with as soon as possible, there won’t be any grey areas or questions when the holiday itself rolls around (although you may need to voice a reminder or two). Typically, we start setting expectations in October, communicating where we’ll be and when, so our families know what to expect. You could do the same with your children, discussing how you’ll be staying home so everyone stays safe and healthy, and how you’ll be making the holidays special in a different way this year. Boundaries often feel awkward at first, but if you voice your intentions, there’s little room for familial pressure and that line of communication can ultimately save a lot of stress and heartbreak (and maybe even someone’s life).
Once you’ve confidently made your plan - the fun can start! While everyone is experiencing different levels of stress this year, there are so many ways to make things special and fun. Personally, I’m looking forward to decorating my home early this year. Normally, I’d be spending my days frantically sourcing holiday materials and expending all my energy decorating my old workplace for the season, but this year is different! Sure, I lost my job, but I’m going into this season with 1/3 the level of stress I normally would have and the energy to decorate MY space for a change. There’s always a silver lining.
A few more ideas for making the 2020 socially distanced holiday season special and fun:
Change up your menu: Confession: I don’t like turkey. I mean, I’ll eat it, but when it comes to a special dinner, turkey is not my first choice. And I don’t think I’m alone in this. Who says you need to eat turkey on Thanksgiving? With many home chefs feeling the home cooking burnout this year, why not indulge and get takeout from a local restaurant? (You’ll be supporting your local economy at the same time!) Or make that amazing dessert you saw on the pages of Martha or on Pinterest? Whether you go the takeout route or decide to make something special on your own, the holidays offer a chance to break out of the norm. I like to make cinnamon rolls on holiday mornings (usually from a can bought at Trader Joes, let’s be real). They’re not what I’d typically go for, which makes them feel totally indulgent and special. Or get some fresh croissants from a local bakery!
Make it special: Raise your hand if you've been living in sweatpants and leggings since March. I’m right there with you and I really miss events and having an excuse to get fancy. So why not make the holidays special with all your finery? Instead of spending the evening in the same duds you’ve been wearing for the past few months, break out an outfit you’d wear to an evening out or to a special celebration. Pour some champagne or make a cocktail (or mocktail!) – this Spiced Honey Bourbon Old Fashioned sounds amazing – and make a toast. Get kids in on the fun with sparkling apple cider or spindrift and fancy glasses.
Get in on the countdown: Remember advent calendars? Me too! I have so many fond memories of being a kid and eating the little waxy chocolates that hid behind each door of our Christmas countdown. They were never very good but the excitement made up for it. Turns out, advent calendars have come a long way in the past 30 years and no longer contain just chocolate. There’s an advent calendar for everyone, kids and adults included, and give everyone a little gift to look forward to daily as you countdown to the holiday of your choosing. A few favorites: This candle advent calendar, this luxe chocolate and truffle advent calendar, and this beautiful self-care advent calendar.
Explore new traditions: As a teen, while my brother and sister were at my dad’s, my mom and I celebrated Thanksgiving by going snowboarding (the mountain served Thanksgiving dinner with the purchase of your ticket) – I LOVED it. We also celebrated Saint Nicholas Day on December 6th (we’re German). We’d leave our shoes on the front step overnight – or in front of the fireplace if the weather was poor – and wake up to a little treat in the morning (usually a chocolate orange). It was such a special tradition and now I appreciate that my mom made the effort to keep that cultural tradition alive for us. What traditions can you create this year? Or bring back from your childhood? There are so many different ways to celebrate – explore some! It could be as elaborate as a cultural tradition from your family background or as simple as new pajamas for the whole family.
Get some fresh air: My personal tradition is to run a 5k on Thanksgiving morning. In years past I’ve signed up for a local turkey trot, and there have been years when I simply run the distance. I love starting out the day with some movement and the quiet streets of a holiday day are my favorite to run – I love how silent and calm things are. This year, Chris and I are thinking of a Thanksgiving hike, and for Christmas, if we have snow, maybe a snowshoe. Getting outdoors is a great way to spend some time and work up an appetite for your special dinner.
Decorate: I’ve noticed some griping over the early Christmas decorations this year. Frankly, I think this year – and any year for that matter – people should do what brings them joy. Halloween all year? Sure. Christmas before Thanksgiving? Why not. Life is too short. Decorate when and how you want to. Go crazy. Get that dopamine flowing.
Have a Zoom party: Ok, look, I think a lot of us are burnt out on Zoom. We all spent a lot of time on it early in this pandemic, and with school and work, the Zoom meetings really haven’t let up. Still, it presents an easy way to spend time with family and connect. If you have kids, why not have them bake the same recipe with their grandparent/s over Zoom? Or if you’re single, you could make cocktails with friends. Just because we’re staying home for the holidays this year doesn’t mean we have to be completely secluded and Zoom or facetime presents the easiest – and SAFEST – way to share in the holiday festivities with our loved ones.
How are you making the holidays special this year? I’d love to know!