It's Your Ship, Baby, Steer It

So, it's time for me to tell you exactly why I've been so stressed out/anxious/excited/cagey: We're moving. To Philadelphia. In a couple of weeks under two weeks.

(If you'd like to know what I looked like as I typed that, please refer to this - I am both Louise AND Tina, at most times actually.)

It's crazy. I feel crazy. We're crazy. Unghhhh... I've been obsessing trying for a week and a half to figure out just how to announce this. How, exactly, to express my/our excitement and sadness, nervousness and over-the-moon-ness (not an actual word) regarding this next chapter in my/our lives, without coming off as... I don't know ... ungrateful? I don't know. What I do professionally is sort of in the public eye as my work is published on the Internet, so announcing any major change like this kind of makes me uncomfortable, there's always so much more going on behind the scenes, so much I don't talk about. I know I shouldn't care, but I think all anyone ever wants is to be understood, so it's hard not to care how people perceive your decisions. The last time I made this sort of announcement people thought I was being all cute-sy and coy about where I was going, when in reality I was just terrified of jinxing myself, of talking about my new job and something not working out. Anyway, what I've realized is that there's no perfect way to do it.

We're no strangers to packing up and moving for the right opportunity, that's exactly what we did when I was hired at ModCloth, after all. We packed up our lives and pointed our compass in the direction of a place we knew nothing about, and it was -- by far -- the largest leap of faith/risk either of us had ever taken. And after a bumpy first year, it worked out, things were really hard emotionally at first for the both of us, but moving to Pittsburgh was so, SO worth it. And while we always knew in our hearts that PGH would be temporary, we really came to love it, especially over the past year and a half. But the thing with temporary stuff is that eventually you leave whatever it is behind, no matter how painful it might be to do so. Our first inkling that our time here might be drawing to a close more quickly than expected came a while back when we found ourselves staring down the possibility of living separately, Chris in New Hampshire, where there were more career opportunities for him, and me in Pittsburgh, where I have a stable job in my industry. But neither of us wanted to go back to long distance (we spent the first two and a half years of our relationship 100 miles apart). It didn't help that, each time we visited home, it became more and more difficult to come back. We're fine with living far away from our families, really, but as we get older we want to see them more than twice a year.

Around the same time that all of this was going down, I came across an amazing opportunity in Philadelphia -- a bigger city with more jobs, that is six hours closer to home -- and applied. And after months and months of interviews, I got it. I got it! And so, after a great deal of deep discussion, polling of family and friends (who are most likely really sick of hearing about all of this), and some major gut checking, Chris and I agreed that this job is my next step and Philly is our next step. And so, starting July 14th I will be joining Free People as an Editorial Specialist. Obviously this decision was a difficult one, and one that I did not take lightly. ModCloth is an incredible company and one that I am very proud to say I have worked for, and of course there's a part of me that's sad to see it in the rear-view mirror. But it's time for me to move forward and for us to be in a city that can offer us both the opportunities we need to grow. Moreover, Pittsburgh will forever hold a place in our hearts as a city that challenged us, charmed us, frustrated us to no end, surprised us, and -- ultimately -- won us over. Part of this is summer talking (Pittsburgh turns on the charm in June and July), but we're going to miss this place. Hard.

We're currently in the process of packing everything up, and "overwhelmed" doesn't even begin to describe it. We'll be moving into temporary housing while I start work, which will give us time to apartment-hunt in person. Right now, we just want to find a place to live. It sounds silly, but besides the friends we made here, the thing I'll miss the most is our Pittsburgh apartment and neighborhood. We love this space and if we had it our way, we'd lift it up and plop it down in Philadelphia. But, knowing what I know now about relocating to a new city, I'm excited to start fresh. To approach Philadelphia with open arms rather than apprehension. It certainly helps that we've been able to visit a few times, that we know more about the area, and that we actually have some friends already there. I'm excited to explore, to meet new people, and to push myself creatively in a new position with a brand that has such a strong identity.

Pittsburgh has us until the 9th. Until then, we'll be visiting all of our favorite spots, spending as much time with our friends here as possible, committing every square inch of our apartment to memory, and having backyard bonfire parties and eating s'mores until we can't stand them. Oh yeah, and maybe doing some packing as well.

Wish us luck, and if you're a fan of Philly, tell me about it! I want to know all your favorite things. Also, tell me about beach spots, because oh-my-sweet-god, we're going to be near the ocean again!